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Pick the app first · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

Connections · New York · Switches

I have alternate weeks, and only one sort of platform can cope

Posted as the_weeks_i_have on 22 August 2026

Wantssomebody who can work with a fortnightly rhythm without sighing
ExperienceTen years, one arrangement of three, ended amicably two winters ago.
Aroundthe Bronx, New York

I have my children half the time, in alternating weeks, and for those seven days my evenings are simply gone. No amount of goodwill moves them. Then the week turns over and I am free more or less every night. A product that assumes you are permanently reachable cannot see a shape like that at all, whereas a written advert states it in one line, which is the entire reason I am here rather than being dealt people somewhere else.

Thirty nine, the Bronx, switch, ten years in. My one long arrangement ran three years and ended for reasons that had nothing to do with the calendar, which is the only time that has been true.

The fast platforms punished the rhythm without ever mentioning it. Somebody would go quiet on my off week and be gone by the time I surfaced, and I do not blame anyone for that, because nothing in the product tells you why a person has vanished.

What I want is ongoing and structured, weighted towards being led, with things to do in the weeks we cannot see each other. I am useful and I am organised.

Not looking for anybody who will describe my situation as complicated. Not looking to meet anyone's family or introduce anyone to mine. And not looking for a person who needs spontaneity, because I have not had any in nine years.

Where a post like this belongs

Two directions is the hardest thing to say on a platform built around one label, and running a second app for the second direction is the usual expensive mistake.

  • Why a second app rarely earns its place
  • A community site and a dating app do different jobs
  • Desires on the profile, instead of one label at the top

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