I have never used a product that deals people out, and I do not intend to start at forty five. What I do is read adverts properly, the way you would read a letter, and answer perhaps four a year. That sounds absurdly slow to anybody used to a stack. It has produced three arrangements, two of them long, and not one evening I regret.
Forty five, Manhattan, dominant, twenty years in. I am not against the fast platforms on principle and I am not sniffy about people who use them. I am against them for me, because I select on things that only appear at length, and the format has no length in it.
What I run is a structured arrangement rather than a series of scenes. Standing expectations, a fixed weekly evening, correction that is verbal and immediate, and a written agreement we revisit instead of signing and forgetting. I am deliberately dull in the first month.
So if you write, tell me something specific about your own week rather than about your role.
Not looking for a list of what you have done and with whom. Not looking to be interviewed and then compared against two other people. And not looking for anybody who wants to be dealt out and chosen, because that habit is precisely what I have organised my life around avoiding.