KinkApp Dating

Pick the app first · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

Connections · London · Still working it out

I have not picked a direction and I am not going to guess

Posted as i_have_not_picked_a_side on 5 September 2026

Wantsconversation with people who were also undecided once
ExperienceA year of reading and two long conversations that went nowhere in particular.
Aroundnorth of the river, London

Every platform I have joined asked me to choose a word before it would show me anything, and I have chosen a different one each time, more or less at random, and then felt like a fraud for a fortnight. So this is me not choosing. I have been reading about this for a year, I find both directions interesting for quite different reasons, and I would rather say so than perform a decision I have not made.

Twenty eight, north of the river. My entire experience is reading, plus two long conversations that were good and went nowhere in particular, one of which ended precisely because I could not answer the question of what I was.

What I have noticed about these places is that the ones which make you choose immediately also make it hardest to change your mind later, because your whole presence there is built on the word you picked in the first five minutes. The written kind lets you describe a situation instead of declaring a type.

So I would like to talk to people who have been here, including anybody who thought they were one thing and turned out to be the other.

Not looking for somebody to decide on my behalf, which I gather is a thing that gets offered. Not looking to be anybody's first experiment. And not in any hurry, because the one thing I am sure of is that guessing quickly is how I wasted last year.

Where a post like this belongs

Nothing here has to be decided first. The mistake is starting on the most kink-native platform you can find, where an undecided profile has the least to hold on to.

Also in London

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