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Pick the app first · Non-explicit · Adults 18+

Connections · New York · Still working it out

The feed learned what I liked and then taught it back to me

Posted as feed_taught_it_back on 30 July 2026

Wantssomebody willing to work out what is mine without a machine helping
ExperienceTwo years on a recommending product, six weeks off everything.
Aroundthe Jersey side, New York

The product I used for two years learned what I lingered on and showed me more of it, and after a while I genuinely could not tell whether I liked what it was showing me or simply recognised it. That is the whole mechanism and there is nothing sinister in it, it is only very effective. By the end I had a set of preferences I could describe fluently and no idea which of them had started with me.

Thirty, the Jersey side, still working it out, and off everything since the spring.

Deleting it in June felt ridiculous at the time. The useful part has been how much less certain I have become since. Half the things I would have listed confidently in March have quietly stopped mattering. One or two have not, and those are presumably the real ones, and I would rather find out which with a person than with a feed.

What I can say honestly is that I want to be told what to do by somebody who has thought about it properly, and that I do not yet know how far that goes or where it stops.

Not looking for anybody who wants a list, since mine is currently being audited. Not looking to be talked back into certainty quickly. And not looking for a person who finds all this precious, which it probably is, though two years of being trained by software has made me careful about the difference between a preference and a habit.

Where a post like this belongs

Nothing here has to be decided first. The mistake is starting on the most kink-native platform you can find, where an undecided profile has the least to hold on to.

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