Being useful on the platform everybody joins turned me into a fixture. I answer questions, I sort out problems, I am one of about a dozen people who quietly keep the thing running. The consequence nobody warned me about is that I cannot go on a date there without three people knowing by the weekend, and that anybody who approaches me has already formed a view from watching me do a job.
Forty eight, north of the river, dominant, nineteen years in. This is not fame and I am not complaining about attention. It is that visibility on that model is indivisible. You cannot be visible for one purpose only.
So I am writing here, on a board where I am nobody in particular, and that is the whole of the appeal. I would like to be assessed as a person with a proposal rather than as somebody who was helpful in a thread once.
The proposal: an ongoing dynamic, weekly, structured, service heavy, with an adult who has a full life and wants a defined part of it to belong to somebody else. I am quieter in private than I appear in public, which has surprised two people badly enough to mention it.
Not looking for anybody who wants access to a circle. Not looking to be a shortcut into anything. And not looking for somebody who needs me to be that public version at home.